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[20 Apr 2003|04:49pm] |
its all a bloody mess. your eyes are almost swollen shut. the blood drips into the little bit of them that is open from the gashes above your eyes. there isn't enough time to tell. as you gasp for a breathe with your smoke-abused lungs that feel as though they are on fire from your broken ribs. it nowhere near the pain that you will feel though. as your stomach fills will the blood that runs down your throat you begin to get sick. is it the rotting of your alcohol-soaked liver or is it just the blood that makes you sick? no matter though because it is nothing compared to the bruised and broken limbs that lay lifeless next to your worthless body. should i continue with your senseless beating into submission to your death? or should i let you choke to death on your own blood as it slowly continues to drip down your throat? either way you will die in agony knowing that i had the last laugh as you gasp for your last breathe. too bad that your pain will never ease my loss. you will leave this world as you entered into it, as a worthless nothing.
x.
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[20 Apr 2003|04:42pm] |
fake smiles. fake glances. eyes that give fake ideas. grins that give fake trust. ties that never last. promises made never to be kept. shear knowing that none of it was real. no sincerity. everything becomes a single sharade. all just smoke and mirrors. an endless funhouse of empty hopes. bonds that were never meant to hold. words that meant nothing more then the letters that form them. white lies that were not meant to hurt turn into realities. when the reality is realized, everything just turns out to be lies. the greatest lie of them all is that there is hope.
x.
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[20 Apr 2003|04:37pm] |
someday i will pass. like everything in this world that comes and goes like notihng ever matters. another grain of sand falls in the hourglass of life. another moment gone by in the eternal time-line. the smallest blip on an endless radar. tears will be shed, but they will dry with time. i will fade into the eternal memory of nothing. another face into the never ending crowd of humanity. someone else who means nothing. born to be nothing.
x.
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[17 Mar 2003|12:53am] |
so many nights spent staring at the cieling. watching the fan spin around in rotation. so many nights spent crying. my eyes still burn from all the tears. all of my thoughts were telling me that it would be okay. in reality i knew the truth. no more hiding from it. no more dodging the inevitable. with time it will all pass. everything will fade from the now to become a memory. just a spot in time in some lonely kid's mind.
x.
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[27 Feb 2003|11:15pm] |
blood flows into the wounds. tears burn in the eyes. breath gets shorter with each inhale and every exhale. lungs strain with the tightening of the chest. hands shake as blood drips from them. voices don't sound as clear as people are yelling. emotions are set in rage. purpose doesn't apply anymore. past the point of no return. the person sits there in pain. they aren't the victim though. they stopped being innocent when they attacked. too bad they aren't dead.
x.
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[25 Feb 2003|11:27pm] |
you were my reason. my perfection was in your eyes. my joy was in your laughter. my tears can never dry. but my eyes stopped seeing. i became blind. and when i recovered, you were nowhere to be found. never again would i find you. why did i lose what i loved most?
x.
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[25 Feb 2003|11:23pm] |
tattered soul. burning flesh. tattered lies. nothing will ever last forever or even for more then a second's glimpse. if it lasts just a while, then it was worth it all. forgotten as shortly after. perfect pictures make wonderful endings. silent thoughts with no answers. tear out the lining inside and open it up into nothing. we are just a temporary lie.
x.
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[25 Feb 2003|03:58pm] |
hang me with my dreams. make sure that my life is choked clean from my last breath of air as my heart stops beating. forget that i said i love you. watch my face as i go numb. don't worry because its almost over. the blood will stop. my heart will die. leave me hanging where i have been strung up. walk away and never look back because i meant nothing.
x.
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[25 Feb 2003|11:01am] |
all the time spent trying. but i have failed you. once again i have come up short. i have failed the test and not made the grade. you were my life and yet i could not hold on. lacking the ability to do something right for a change. once more i drop my hopes with my own failure. a plague that i cannot escape.
x.
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[25 Feb 2003|01:33am] |
i am at the point of no return. i am already past the breaking point. this time you've gone too far. i never thought it would come to this. why have you provoked me to this? you words went too far this time. what you have said was over the line. you cause this drama like its fun for you. you act as though i am wrong. this is your fault. and you will live with the consequences. your blood will be spilled. my hands will be soiled. now prepare for my agony.
x.
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distancekills's journal